I consider myself to be a very confident woman, yet somehow I spent many years feeling like no matter what I did I was just not enough and wondered why.
I was like I'm cute, nice, God fearing, educated, funny...did I mention cute??? LOL
Seriously tho, I would find myself going into a relationship feeling strong and full of confidence only to later feel like damn what's wrong with me? Why am I not good enough?
I cook, I clean, I'm a great mom, I take care of myself and keep myself up. I'm kind and thoughtful so damn! What's the problem?
I was year 2018 years old when I finally figured it out.
I was with the wrong damn people! Because I like to help people and "fix" things, I was attracting broken people. It was Trina to the rescue lol
It could have been that I was focusing on fixing them so that I wouldn't have to focus on fixing me.
Now please don't get me wrong. I am not saying that there was no love there or that I was perfect in the relationship. Lord knows I am a flawed sista, but I have finally learned that it's ok to be flawed and sometimes love just ain't enough to sustain a relationship.
The issue was that I was attracting people who were only making withdrawals from me instead of deposits. They were not pouring anything positive into my life, nor were they enhancing my life in the way that they should have been.
I share equal blame, as I allowed that to happen to me...and then I woke the hell up. I had to "do the work", and isolate myself and figure myself out in order to become a better me.
After months of soul searching, I finally found myself and realized that I am enough! Flaws and all! The right people will see that in me and appreciate me just as I am. More importantly, I now know that I am enough for me.
Finally, I believe it.
You will never be enough for the wrong person. I know that now.
Lawd knows that it is not easy to dig deep and be totally transparent and honest with yourself, but it must be done in order for change and growth to occur. It's hard. Period.
Because I took the time to heal, learn about myself and change my thinking, I was able to attract people who are good for my soul. Thank God for growth.
I'm a work of art...a masterpiece.
I have also learned that being enough does not mean that I am everything or that I don't need anyone or any help. It simply means that my imperfections do not reflect my worth. God created me this way and it's ok to just be myself.
I will never be perfect, nor will I ever be done growing, changing and learning, but I AM ENOUGH and so are you! This applies to all areas of your life (relationships, friends, family and career).
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